Casting Couch: Karl Rove

Karl Rove: the man behind the man. Rove has been in politics almost all his life. Despite growing up in the 60s, he has always been a conservative, and dropped out of college to work for the College Republicans and go campus to campus organizing conservative groups (he somehow kept his student deferment out of Vietnam). Basically, the guy was something of a political nerd, lacking charm, looks, and family connections.

Throughout Rove's campaign work he has been dogged by accusations of dirty tricks. He was accused of using racist and homophobic innuendo to turn voters away from his opposition in many campaigns.

Rove came to the national spotlight through his consultation of George W. Bush, the man with charm and family connections to spare. He guided Bush from failed businessman, to the Texas governorship, to the presidency, and along the way picked up the moniker "Bush's brain."

Through his relationship to Bush, Rove has come very rare power and prestige.



That is why (at the suggestion of SAM blogger Doug Flynn) we are casting Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars as Karl Rove. They are that shadowy figure behind the one getting who gets all the attention. They are the voice whispering in their protege's ear.

And they are both pure evil.

"The force is strong with this one."

Click for past casting couch segments:

Bill Richardson

Barack Obama

Fred Thompson

Hillary Clinton

Casting Couch: Bill Richardson

In our on going effort decide who would best portray notable political figures in their life story, we come to New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson.



Mr. Richardson is a proud Mexican- American, and a very accomplished individual. He is a former Congressman, former Secretary of Energy, former Ambassador to the UN, and current governor. He also has a reputation of being something of a ladies man (if you can believe it). He's a good speaker and has a good sense of humor.

So to cast him we need someone with the total package. A modern- day Renaissance man, with all the tools.



Or, we could just go with SNL comic Horatio Sanz because they look so much alike.

Either way.

Click for past casting couch segments:

Barack Obama

Fred Thompson

Hillary Clinton

Casting Couch: Barack Obama

Here's an intriguing one-- casting Barack Obama in the man's life story.


His big ears and charm might suggest Will Smith, but that's too obvious. We need someone a little unexpected for the man who constantly defied expectations. His voice is certainly one of his trademarks-- loud, clear, forceful, powerful. We should go with someone who has that kind of voice. Also we need someone who can get the masses excited, someone with a loyal and broad following. After all this is the man with a 250,000 donor list, the self-proclaimed Hope machine.

So we'll go with...



Dwayne "the Rock" Johnson.

Of course! This guy was the self proclaimed "People's Champion" of Pro-wrestling, but has moved on to bigger and better (?) things with a big movie career. Plus, as SAM blogger Doug Flynn points out, the two are voice TWINS!

Even the Rock's catchphrase fits nicely:
"If ya smellllllllllllllllllll what Ba- Rack is cookin'!"

Past casting couch segments:

Fred Thompson as........... Fred Thompson

Sean Penn as................... Hillary Clinton

Casting Couch: Fred Thompson

This is a tough one.



For former Senator Thompson we need someone with gravitas, a big voice and a long Hollywood resume. We need someone who really looks like a serious politician (regardless of how seriously he actually takes the job); someone who is a go-to for directors and casting agents when filling the role of a president, senator, police chief, top attorney, or guy-in-the-know.

This has got to be someone who has stage presence, you're not sure what he stands for, but he looks damn good standing there. Come to think of it, I think I know just the guy...

Fred Thompson



Who else but the star of Die Hard 2: Die Harder, In the Line of Fire, and The Hunt For Red October (not to mention all those Law and Orders) could fill the shoes of the two term senator from Tennessee? Ronald Reagan would be proud.

Casting Couch: Hillary Clinton

We at SAM have a few running segments: Quote of the Day, Political Dictionary, etc.

Here's a new one... The Casting Couch- where we take political figures and cast who will star in their life story.

First up: Hillary



We need someone with acting chops, because this is going to be an emotional rollercoaster (maybe someone who can shed a tear or two); we need someone whose got that angular face; and maybe someone with a bit of a political "conscience" to boot. Someone versatile who can play the sympathetic hero, the conniving villan, or the dead pan side kick; also necessary is someone who's experienced MANY hairstyles over the years.

Hmmm... let's go with....

Sean Penn



Any thoughts?